Bucketloads of wha--?
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
From Blogzarro. A few of my favorites:
Ralph: Me fail English? That’s unpossible.
Lionel Hutz: This is the greatest case of false advertising I’ve seen since I sued the movie “The Never Ending Story.”
Nelson: Dad didn’t leave… When he comes back from the store, he’s going to wave those pop-tarts right in your face!
Homer: Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It’s what separates us from the animals…except the weasel.
Mr. Burns: I’ll keep it short and sweet — Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.
Homer: Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
Marge: Get ready, skanks! It’s time for the truth train!
Chief Wiggum: I hope this has taught you kids a lesson: kids never learn.
Troy McClure: Hi. I’m Troy McClure. You may remember me from such self-help tapes as “Smoke Yourself Thin” and “Get Some Confidence, Stupid!”
Apu: Please do not offer my god a peanut.
Nelson: Shoplifting is a victimless crime. Like punching someone in the dark.
Bart: I didn’t think it was physically possible, but this both sucks *and* blows.
Comic Book Guy: Oh, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix.
Mr. Burns: Whoa, slow down there, maestro. There’s a *New* Mexico?
Ed Begley Jr.: I prefer a vehicle that doesn’t hurt Mother Earth. It’s a go-cart, powered by my own sense of self-satisfaction.
Barney: Aaah! Natural light! Get it off me! Get it off me!
Full list here.
I ran this as a link a few weeks ago but there are just too many great ones here to risk you not seeing them.
He just came out of the crapper.
"Thank you. I just had it stuffed."
You have five seconds to get off Facebook and print my document.
Nice rack. Bud Man like!
It's okay, I'm a celebrity. I'm on Modern Family.
Nice coat, Cruella DeVille
Yes, mistress, I will be on time when I'm bringing the coffee.
Those are her own hands. Doesn't count.
I see your point.
Okay, you can have Friday off.